HAVE IT

If you want my love

If you really do

Have it, have it

I want you to

And if you want my soul

If it's really true

Have it, have it

Please do, do, do, do

No need to swear

How much you care

If you just couldn't care less

I hate when saying what we mean

When what we mean is the opposite

Don't ask me why if it weren't for my

Lack of confidence I would grow

You're not the first girl in my life

But the first to let my feelings show

And if you want my love

If you really do

Have it, have it

I want you to

Please do, do, do, do

No need to swear

How much you care

If you just couldn't care less

I hate when saying what we mean

When what we mean are opposites

Don't ask me why if I weren't so shy

I don't think I'd hesi, hesitate

You're not the first girl in my life

But the first to make me feel this way

And if you want my love

If you really do

Have it, (have it), have it, (have it)

Have it, ( have it), have it, ( have it)

Oh if you want my love

Baby have it

Please do

_{_________________________________________}

A SIGHT FOR SORE EYES

Some stupid guy with his head in the clouds

Thinks the world is a wondrous place

Next thing you know as he's looking around

Plane hits him in the face

A sight for sore eyes are couples who think

Marriage is not for them

They want their children to know their dad

Is only their partner's friend

I'm going backwards the way I came in

Going forward the same way out

I've got some blue chips to go with my fish

Which is still swimming round about

The sight of a pedophile being abused

A stalker being followed home

Who wouldn't give their right arm to see

A scientist being cloned

What do you do when your think you're in love

And she tells you you must be sure

How do you manage to get out of that

When you know that her heart is pure

Know that her heart is pure

On the wings of a dove fight has broken out

Someone flew in a rage hurling drinks about

I'm gonna love you as long as I can

For as long as we both agree

I'm gonna leave you the rest of my life

Along with some jewellery

A sight for sore eyes are couples who think

There's no need for men

If they want a child they just go to a lab

Get it artificially insemmed

Some stupid guy has his arm in a lock

And he can't seem to find the key

Someone should tell him it's probably where

The key to his heart would be

The key to his heart would be

And I'll cry like a big girl

And I'll kick like an ass

Who needs 18/30

50 plus is a gas

I'm gonna love you as long as I can

For as long as we both shall live

I'm going to leave you the rest of my life

For as long as it's mine to give

As long as it's mine to give

_{_________________________________________}

WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?

You know my inside pockets

Got my outside twin

So badly indisposed

I think I'll dust my bin

And all the while you're making eyes at me

You could be doing something useful

Like climbing up a tree

Who knows there may be something lurking

Like a koala bear

All the way from down under

But don't ask me where

And on the subject of Australia

Did you know some wives

Don't mind when their husbands

Get home at night

Know what I mean

Every time I get home late

My wife says where the hell have you been

Oh Helen do be careful lying in the sun

Don't mind what you take off

Long as you've something on

And all the while

You give the neighbours a thrill

You could be doing something useful

Like climbing up a hill

Okay so hills do not agree with you

Then try one that's flat

Surely there's no better way

That's better than that

And on the subject of alternatives

Did you know some guys

Don't mind when their girlfriends

Get home at night

Oh what a dream

If I'm just a minute late

My wife says where the hell have you been

And all the while you're making eyes I see

You could be doing something useful

Like climbing over me

Now then there's nothing to be frightened of

I won't let you fall

Dare I say it I just hope

That you'll be enthralled

And on the subject of enthrallment

Do you know some wives

Don't mind when their husbands

Come home at night

Know what I mean

Every time I get home late

Mine says where the hell have you been

_{_________________________________________}

ME

Oh why do people look at me

As though I were a freak

Oh can't they see that what they’re looking at

Is quite unique

In fact I’d go as far as saying

I’m something of a gem

Whose qualities do not expire

They simply overwhelm

If I believe the half of what

Most analysts now claim

Then photos of me must be put

Into a zimmer frame

You can't make music at your age

It simply isn't done

Well balls to those who take that view

Especially if they’re young

Me I believe a child that misbehaves

And answers back

Would benefit for what it did

By being given a smack

Why do people

Why do people

Why do people

I’m happy being middle aged

Where confidence is full

When growing up my sister's doll

Was all that I could pull

Your eyes are blue

Your eyes are green

What difference does it make?

As long as you've no more than two

And only one's a fake

I‘ve never felt the urge to burn

The candle at both ends

The logic of it does indeed

Make very little sense

Imagine trying to place it somewhere

After it's been lit

With flames above it and below

There's nowhere it would fit

Let alone a candlestick

Let alone a candlestick

_{_________________________________________}

SAY GOODBYE

Say goodbye say good morning

Say good evening and good noon

Say hello tell me how you're feeling

Very well thanks and how are you

Say you did say you didn't

Say it's someone else instead

Say it's me would I be forgiven

Or is it something that I said

In spite of fears over what charges are proposed

In spite of tears over what secrets are disclosed

In spite of ears I have never heard you once complain

(Japanese Version)

Sayonara konbanwa

Ohayo-gozaimasu kon-nichiwa

Kon-nichiwa gokigen-ikaga-desuka

Genki-desu arigato anatawa-ikaga-desuka

(Spanish Version)

Di adios, di buenas noches

Di buenos días, te sientes bien

Di hola, dime

Cómo te sientes?

Muy bien gracias

Y que tal estás?

In spite of fears over inflation going up

In spite of tears over the breaking of a cup

In spite of years seems like it was only days ago

Say it is say it isn't

Say it's someone else instead

Say it's good when you don't like fishing

You just knock it on the head

You just knock it on the head

On the head

On the head

Say goodbye say good morning

Say good evening and good noon

Say hello tell me how you're feeling

Very well thanks and how are you

In spite of fears over a lack of crowd control

In spite of tears over a bag that someone stole

In spite of years I have never seen you look so well

Look so well

Look so well

(Japanese Version)

Sayonara konbanwa

Ohayo-gozaimasu kon-nichiwa

Kon-nichiwa gokigen-ikaga-desuka

Genki-desu arigato anatawa-ikaga-desuka

(Spanish Version)

Di adios, di buenas noches

Di buenos días, te sientes bien

Di hola, dime

Cómo te sientes?

Muy bien gracias

Y que tal estás?

_{_________________________________________}

DON'T I KNOW IT

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it

How you don't love me girl

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it

How you don't want me girl

I was wrong to have took for granted

All the love you have given me

Should have tried even that bit harder

Now I'm made to suffer and as you can see

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it

How you don't want me girl

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it

How you don't love me girl

Like to think that it doesn't matter

Love to feel that I just don't care

But the truth after all that's happened

I can't live without you and when you're not there

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it, don't I know it

You could say that I had my chances

And that I let them slip away

You could argue it's not all my fault

Still I got it wrong and at the end of the day

the end of the day, the end of the day

The end of the day, the end of the day

The end of the day, the end of the day

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it, don't I know it

Don't I know it, don't I know it

_{_________________________________________}

HOW I SAY THAT I LOVE YOU

You know I love you what more can I say

Although the words themselves are not my way

For me a kiss that lasts a minute or two

Is how I say that I love you

The tea and toast I bring us up in bed

The pleasure I get when you stroke my head

That I can be there when you use the loo

Is how I say that I love you

And in the end what have we got

If not ourselves then not a lot

My friends they meet a girl and right away

The words I love you are all they can say

That I send flowers with the words guess who

Is how I say that I love you

If meningitis can so easily kill

Surely there are flaws

We're spending millions modifying our food

Could that not be a cause

You know I love you in a special way

Although the words themselves I rarely say

For me it's more than just the things we do

Is how I say that I love you

I found this photo from a few years back

Taken out in Spain

Your hair was longer

But apart from that

You look just the same

You know I love you in my own sweet way

Although the words themselves I rarely say

That I wear most of what you tell me to

Is how I say that I love you

Is how I say that I love you

Is how I say that I love you

_{_________________________________________}

PASSPORT PHOTOS

I really love you baby

When I need a laugh

I check out passport photos

They're what give me that

Look at yours and your friends

See if you agree

Passport photos always

Do the biz for me

Show me one that you've got

You'd like to see enlarged

Show me one that doesn't

Look like your being charged

Smile of course you mustn't

That's the only rule

Irony of course is

You just look a fool

Sideburns down to your chin

Hair all long and straight

No doubt when you took it

You thought you looked great

Ain't nobody living

That's ever had one that

Ever did them justice

That just isn't a gaffe

For the life of me I don't

Understand why in Spain

When it rains at an airport

Mainly wet is the plane

I really love you baby

When I need a laugh

I check out passport photos

They're what give me that

Go through immigration

Waiting next in line

A man there can't believe it

When he looks at mine

Show me one that you've got

You'd like to see enlarged

Show me one that doesn't

Look like your being charged

Here's looking at you kid

Looking like you're from the twilight zone

I really love your body

When I need a laugh

I check out passport photos

They're what give me that

They're what give me that

They're what give me that

_{_________________________________________}

WATER MUSIC

Let the water music

Take you to the brim

Let the water music

Take you for a swim

Let the water music

Teach you to roll

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Let the rhythm of it

Wash you away

Let the vision of it

Be of a bay

Let the crowd around you

Sink down a hole

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Water music is the essence of life

Jump into it and it opens up wide

Off your shoulder

It can carry the weight

Water music is great

Let the water music

Fill you to the brim

Let the water music

Hold your breath in

Let the running of it

Gently cajole

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Water music is the essence of life

It can rid you of all trouble and strife

Jump into it as it opens its gate

Water music is great

Water music is great

Water music is great

Let the water music

Fill you to the brim

Let the water music

Take you for a swim

Let the water music

Get you to roll

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Let the water music soothe your soul

Water music is the essence of life

Jump into it and it opens up wide

Off your shoulder

It can carry the weight

Water music is great

Let the water music

Take you to the brim

Let the water music

Take you for a swim

Let the water music

Get you to roll

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

Let the water music

Soothe your soul

_{_________________________________________}

FINE BY ME

I'm tired of beating round bushes

That don't exist

I'm sick to death of being dropped

At the flick of a wrist

I'd like my batteries charged

And the charge of course to be cheap

And if you want to make love

In the back of a van

With a rabbit's foot on your knee

It's fine by me

You know I hate to be boring

But what's the point

Calling a little bit of weed

You smoke a joint

I mean the only joint I know

Worth it's salt is beef

If there's a key to my heart

And there's only one

But you think there should be three

It's fine by me

It's fine by me

And I need a woman now

Like some men need a man

Spend a lot of my money

In and out of banks

You see a teller you like

And you tell her thanks

You have a nice disposition

Disposition is clear

If there's a mark on your dress

And you take it off

Just so I can see

It's fine by me

It's fine by me

Fine by me

Fine by me baby

I have a sneaking suspicion

You're on my tail

And if that's where you want to be

It's fine by me

It's fine by me

And I need a woman now

Like some men need a wife

You get a lot of ideas

Looking at a soap

I get a lot of mine too

If it's on a rope

I like to twist it and twirl it

Wind it around my feet

If you think God is a woman

And there's no doubt

That's what you want him to be

It's fine by me

It's fine by me

It's fine by me

Fine by me

Fine by me

_{_________________________________________}

TWO'S COMPANY (THREE IS ALLOWED)

Sellotape is sticky

Now there's a surprise

Next they'll tell you you can see out of your eyes

Mummified mummies daddies little girl

Had the operation then became an earl

Once you would have kissed her gently on the cheek

Now she kisses you beginning with your feet

Roles that are reversing so misunderstood

Kids who think monogamy is a piece of wood

Ooh but two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

These days as a woman you are out of place

If you're not a lesbian whose friends are gays

Anything is normal normal is of course

Getting married after planning your divorce

Usually I don't go much at all on twins

Once you've seen the one you've seen them both I think

Mind you when they're pretty pretty as a peach

Whose to say that on the day with one of each

Ooh two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Three is allowed

I look like I wanna look I wear what I like

It won't be a suit and no it won't be a tie

A tie is a dead heat not a knot round your neck

Neck is what you do when

(Neck is what you do when)

Alone with your girlfriend

Ooh but two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Two's company three is allowed

Three is allowed

_{_________________________________________}

LOVE BEEN FAXED BY YOU

Oh what a feeling when you're up all night

Get home to see that in the morning light

Whether it's cold out there's no doubt

Love being faxed by you

Looks like a piece of junk till it gets turned on

So good at getting to anywhere you want

Even if one time it's one line

Love being faxed by you

I despise the telephone when it goes and I am home

I just say I'm out

Anyone whose mobile rings on a train that I am in

I just scream and shout

Let there be no doubt

Give their ears a clout

Night time's the right time in the U.S.A.

They're only starting up as you end your day

Whether it's New York an old Cork

Love being faxed by you

I despise the telephone when it goes and I am home

I pretend I'm out

Anyone whose mobile rings on a train I'm sitting in

I just scream and shout

Let there be no doubt

Give their ears a clout

Oh for the fun of it when you're on your own

Oh for the joy it gives as you head for home

Maybe I'm crazy but lately

Love being taxed by you

After a hard day I must say

Love being faxed by you

And I don't know what I'd do now without it

And I don't know how without I'd live

Would that I did

And I don't care if it runs out of paper

I don't mind if at time it's a mess

It's still the best

_{_________________________________________}

EASIER SAID THAN DONE

What does it matter where you lay your hat

Is it your home if it's a laundromat

The point I'm getting at is even if

You think that you can make a go of it

It's easier said than done

It's easier said than done

Easier said than done

Show me that girl that just wants to have some fun

Isn't it wonderful to give up meat

A healthy vegetable is such a treat

I've got this lettuce I'm about to dig

What if it tells me that it wants to live

It's easier said than done

It's easier said than done

Easier said than done

Show me where a leaf out of any book comes from

A summer's day in dead of winter

A new year's ball being headed in

A fleet of cars out on the ocean

Causing a tail back to the fin

It's easier said than done

It's easier said than done

Easier said than done

Tell me what kind of a fugitive

Is a rabbit on the run

A bed of nails a bed of roses

I know which on I'd rather sleep

You can be sure mixamatosis

Isn't the way you cross your feet

You study hard at college to prepare

For unemployment in the world out there

And while the level you've attained is high

Getting a job for which you qualify

It's easier said than done

It's easier said than done

Easier said than done

Show me that girl that wants some fun

Show me a man giving birth to a son

Show how you get from A to Z

With an alphabet in front

It's easier said than done

Easier said than done

_{_________________________________________}

ME - REPRISE

You'd never think to look at

You'd never think to look at

That building there is where there

Used to be trees

You'd never think it, would you?

You'd never think it, would you?

That building there is where there

Used to be trees

That building there is where there

That building there is where there

That building there is where there

Used to be fields

You'd never think to look at

You'd never think to look at

That building there is where there

Used to be trees

Used to be trees

_{_________________________________________}

All lyrics and music by Gilbert O'Sullivan